31st December 2005 Saturday

Met up with QH, Fion and YM last night. Been ages since I last saw Fion and QH and they were commenting about how hard it was to get me out. Am I really that anti-social? Had KFC's fiery flava chicken again for dinner. The chicken taste normal, as usual and the sweet and spicy sauce tasted as lousy as ever. Chilled out there for about two hours talking about the relationships of those around us. We were touching on the topic of how tiring it is for one to be always giving without being reciprocated when that topic sort of set me thinking. Haven't we always heard about true love being one in which you give and never expect to be reciprocated? Then if it was tiring giving without receiving, then wouldn't that not be true love? I guess that is the difference between ideality and reality. They just ain't the same. Just like it would be ideal if the world was without borders, without wars and everyone love each other like his own. But is that really possible? That also applies to the theory on true love. I do not mean that there aren't guys out there who give without expecting anything in return. I meant that even if such guys exists, there is bound to be a hidden hope deep inside to be given the same amount of love as that which is given. Even if there isn't such a hidden hope, there is bound to be some form of tiredness after doing so much and not getting anything in return. It is like shouting at a wall to get out of your way. You really do not expect it to answer and acede to your request. But it does get tiring after shouting for an hour or so won't it? And if you are thinking about those guys who think that it is more important for the other party to be blissful, even at the expense of their own bliss, the chance of you finding one in this modern world is as good as the chance of you finding a dinosaur in the middle of Orchard Road. You can imagine the odds.

Training hard to love without being loved......